Haunting…

There are a few words that have been haunting me these last ten days or so…”Maybe you aren’t as close to God as you think you are.”

I first heard those words at The Whiteboard Sessions spring 2008, delivered by Vince Antonucci.  I had quoted him a few times over the last year, mostly in regards to others whom I was essentially judging for not reaching out a hand to the lost and broken.  This last week, God turned my tables upside down.  He clearly communicated to me, “Jason, maybe you aren’t as close to me as you think you are.”  This shook me.  What shook me most was that I knew it.  I’ve known it all along.  I knew I was substituting message prep and creative planning for intimate time with my Abba and Savior.  I have just kept justifying it.  “But God, people are coming to your Son at a greater rate than I have ever experienced in my life.”  The whole time he was saying, “But Jason, I want to be with you too.”

On my retreat this last week, I was reminded of a song from 1986 by Gospel music’s Larnelle Harris.  The song is called, “I Miss My Time With You.”  In this era of modern churches, it seems maybe a little cheesy…but, it reminded me that God comes each day to our spot, waiting for me to arrive.  He never misses a day.  He always arrives on time and is never weary of hearing from me.  Day after day, God continues to be faithful to me while I go off and schedule all kinds of things in his place.  If there is one thing God spoke to me during my retreat, it was “Stop trying to do this alone.  I can, will, and want to help…Come to me.”

The rest of this week I will expand on how that impacts all the other areas of my life…

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